Michael worked as night manager of a Popeye's. He took the job because he could get free beer. Every night, he got insanely drunk. One evening he sauntered in particularly late around 3 a.m. Being the yenta I am, I started to give him a piece of my mind.

"But I have a good excuse this time," he whined. "You see, we're having this new skinless chicken promotion, and I had to change the display sign. Well, I got myself a beer and went to get the letters, but there weren't enough S's to spell the word skinless. So I had to come up with another way of saying it. So I had a beer, and I thought about it, then I had another beer, and I thought about it, and it wasn't until after I had my fifth beer that I came up with another way."

"...What did you write, Michael?"

"Buck Naked Chicken."

The next morning his boss called and demanded to speak to Michael. "Go wake up your boyfriend!" "He's still asleep." "Well get him up!" "Look since you're just going to fire him, I'll just pass on the message, ok?" "Fire him?" he said. "Oh no, I'm not going to fire him. I need him to get down here because he's the only one tall enough to change the goddamned sign!"

Michael was the first man I ever loved, who truly loved me back. He was also the first person to make me feel like a real girl.